February 2012





It could be something subtle: your married friends constantly telling you “the news” of everyone they know who is about to get married or have a baby. Or it could be blatantly obvious (and embarrassing) like your mother trying to set you up with her hairdresser’s son.

So what do you do when everyone but you thinks you should have a man?

Well there are a few tactics:

  • Find yourself a really good friend who will be a ‘stand in’ man at certain family functions and events to keep your mother momentarily happy. (Bribery involving alcohol might be needed here.)
  • Become a self-professed man-hater, suddenly declaring yourself sworn off men forever.
  • An obvious one, but possibly hard to pull off – is to declare that you now gay (however, your friends probably won’t be fooled for too long especially if they see one sneaking out of the house via your back door.)
  • Tell everyone that you are considering religious life (again, this will probably not fool anyone for too long).
  • Throw some statistics around: that over a third of marriages end in divorce and you don’t want to be a statistic so you are waiting for that absolutely perfect man.
  • Another good statistic – the average age of marriage in Australia is 31.5 years, so there is plenty of time!
  • Honestly is the best policy with family: make your Mum a cup of tea, open a pack of Tim Tams and carefully and honestly explain to her your reasons for not “having a man” at this point in time.
  • Use the psychological approach: tell her you don’t want to find a relationship in order to escape from personal problems and unhappiness – that you are concerned for your emotional safety and want to find someone with whom you share common life goals and priorities.
  • As for your friends, tell them you’re playing the field while you still can and invite them to live life vicariously through you.

Can you think of any other ways to fend off unwelcome pressure from your mother and married friends to ‘find a man’? We’d love to hear it!

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